On Monday last week when we were in Sweden, Jim, my sister, my mom and I drove to the biggest superstore in Scandinavia, Gekas in Ullared. I worked there one summer after high school and my sister works there now, so we’ve talked about it and Jim was curious. This store is located in Falkenberg, out in the forest away from the actual city that I grew up in. As kids we went there only to buy a bunch of cheap crap to put in our little girl rooms. For some weird reason this superstore has become the biggest tourist attraction in Sweden. People from all over Scandinavia and other countries fly in to spend all their savings on cheap stuff. Some people can spend days there. The store has built hotels and they have camping areas nearby. A few years ago they started a tv-show about the employees and shoppers in the store and this is apparently a big hit. The store has expanded and expanded and now they have restaurants, cafes, hairdressers, spa’s and kids play areas, so you can park your cart and relax with other things and then go back to shopping. This. Is. Insane.
Our days in Sweden last week went by fast. It was tough to be there but at the same time it was very nice to spend time with family and other relatives. It was hard to be in grandmas house without having her there, but we all tried to enjoy the company of each other. I’m also very happy that Jim got to spend time with my relatives and finally got to meet everyone, even if it wasn’t the happiest occasion.
One day there we drove on what’s called Hallands most beautiful road (Halland is the region that Falkenberg is a part of). Quiet. Green. Water. The smell of nature and the sound of birds. Sweden is a very beautiful country and to show it to my American husband has made me realize that. Who knows, maybe we’ll have a summer house there in the future..?:)
I can’t believe that we have been married for 3 years already. But at the same time it feels like we have been married for 20, haha. I guess that when you have found the right person it can feel like you’ve known each other all your life. He makes me so happy and I am lucky to have met him ♥ Yesterday, my husband and I celebrated our anniversary by flying back to America. Everything went very smooth this time, which is unusual. On our second flight we got upgraded to premium seats which was nice with more space, more drink options and better screens. When we got back to Manhattan, we picked up Thor at the dog sitter’s and then we passed out on the couch. I haven’t slept much this trip because of full moon, a funeral, jet-lag, things to take care of and food to eat. But I feel well rested today. Thor and I have been taking long walks, even though its really really hot outside.
Photo from 2014 when we took my grandma to a restaurant by the beach
We’re going to Sweden on Saturday. It will feel weird. We’re not going for a fun vacation, we’re going to say goodbye to someone I love. But, even if this trip is the most horrible trip I’ve ever had to do, I don’t want to make it all bad. I’m thinking of things to enjoy while I’m there. For example, spending time with family has never felt so important. But I’m also going to enjoy the Swedish nature and food that I miss. There is too many meals that I want though. I might have to eat lunch and dinner ten times a day, hahah. They probably going to have to roll me on the plane back to the states:)
On Sunday morning, at 5am, Thor started to bark and we thought he was just barking at some random noise outside, which he does sometimes. Eventually I got out of bed and walked out of the bedroom. Smoky, smelly and men being noisy in the hallway. I made sure that Jim was awake and then I put on a lot of clothes, got Thor’s travel bag out of the closet, got my passport and greencard and told Jim to get ready in case we had to evacuate the apartment. Jim, who’s always calm in every situation, slowly went to the bathroom and I tried to tell him that I don’t think this is fake. Soon they started to bang on our door. We grabbed Thor and carefully opened the door. A fireman in a mask asked us to stay by the window in our apartment. After a half hour or so, when we understood that they were only cleaning out the last bit of smoke, we left the apartment and took Thor for a walk. The family and their puppy in the apartment across the hall from us are safe. Their stove had a glitch that they noticed before they went to bed and they were going to ask someone to look at it in the morning. Well, the daughter woke up and saw black smoke in the kitchen. I’m so glad that they noticed it when they did and didn’t have to inhale too much smoke. Scary. I have been afraid of fires every since I was a little girl. Every night before bedtime as a kid, I planned out my escape if there would be a fire somewhere. Jim is used to me freaking out from even the smallest things related to fire. For example, I refuse to use the oven unless he’s home. But, I’m rather scared of it and mentally prepared for survival situations. Like I said, my husband is always calm and on Sunday morning I was surprised on how calm I was too. My only job was to make sure that Thor was calm and felt safe. Thor did so good. I want to believe that he understood what was going on. And I’m happy that he woke us up, our little Lassie:)
I took Jeanette’s kundalini yoga class on Monday and my guess is that it started something in my body, cause I’ve had a bad cold since the morning after that. The class was great, lots of heart openings which was what I needed after a few days of dealing with everything. When we are sad, stressed, going through traumas or grief, our bodies tend to get very tight in shoulders, neck and hips. I was so tight in every muscle and after that class I had “workout pain” everywhere, haha. All the meditation got me to release things I kept inside. I could have stayed there all day probably. Jeanette and I went for dinner after and it was very nice to just sit and talk for hours about nothing and everything.
Yesterday I went for lunch and playground time with Emma and Levy. I wasn’t feeling great and my energy was low, but it was very nice to get some fresh air in the sun and to catch up with a friend.
My mom and aunt face-timed me both on Tuesday and Wednesday. They were in grandmas house and it was actually kinda weird for me to see them walk around there, but I really appreciate that they let me be a part of it all even when I’m so far away from everybody. I always feel distant to everyone and when something like this happens it’s hard to feel like I’m a part of it.
My husband and I booked our flights to Sweden right when we heard about the funeral. After my trip to Sweden in April, it was the first time ever that I didn’t have a plan for when my next trip there would be. I was just hoping it wouldn’t be for this reason. But this is life and we have to accept it. I’m looking forward to see my family and relatives, I just wish it was for something more fun. It will be two very tough weeks until I get to say goodbye. I’m lucky to have my husband and friends by my side through it all.
You were a friend, you were hilarious without knowing it, you were kind and a real badass grandma. My favorite moments were when we baked the worlds best cinnamon buns, and all those years we went to that special place with all the beautiful Lily of the Valley, and when you taught me how to knit and every time I tried it ended up looking like crap, and when the two of us had “fika” in your backyard and just talked about random shit for hours. I love how excited you were about your greenhouse, how into sports you were, I love that you sent me hand written letters even though you knew how to write emails and I love that you were this cool person that I gladly introduced friends to. You’ve given me lots of good advice and supported me in decisions over the years and I am forever thankful. I’ve tried to be there for you too, but I’m not sure I’ve done just as great job as you did for me. I’m very happy you got to meet my husband and that you got to see videos of Thor. I’m happy that I was there to take you to the beach one last time two years ago. I’m happy that I got to see you in April when I was in Sweden. I somehow felt that it was the last time I was going to see you. And you were hilarious as always. I can always wish to spend time with you one more time or to hold your hand once more or to listen to one more of your funny stories, but even if I would have got one more moment with you, I would still just wish for one more. When it’s time it’s time and we have to accept that the last time was the last one. But I miss you a lot, and I wish for one more time. I was told that you died in your sleep without pain. You’ve had a tough year and you are probably having a great time now, wherever you are. I love you, you know that, and you will forever be in my heart. May you rest in peace. I’m sure we’ll meet again one day ♥
I look absolutely insane here, but this picture captions
the goofy relationship we had, so I will post it anyway